I'm not gone

I promise you that.





I don't think I wanna be 18 anymore... To think of it I was never looking forward to it anyway. The day after I turned 18 I got a letter from all these different banks telling me about Mortgages and loans and... get this, "Preparing for your child's future" wth? I'm 18, no job barely making it through college and you think I'm paying these bills and raising kids? I understand this situation is very much real for some people but for me, wow it's a bit of a shock. Makes me say Thank YOU Lord for provision through my mum... Then I get another letter from my bank saying that I have an overdraft of £6 so they were gonna charge me £25, my jaw dropped - I'll tell you what I did I went over to Santander Bank and said to them. I'm not paying... Cut a very long story short I didn't pay and they let me of for it. But anyways this just made think like wow, I'm responsible, not the "My mum went away for the weekend so I'm watching my little sisters" kind of responsible. But a more "If I mess my life up, mum isn't gonna come and mop up the spillages"  If that makes sense. I kind of feel indifferent about this whole turning 18 thing (I'm still 12 at heart lol) But then again I'm scared, If God permits; I'll be heading off to University this year and I think that is when everything is going to kick in. I take too much for granted and maybe turning 18 has reminded me that. Either way it's a long road ahead... Jesus take the wheel.

Hello adulthood.